


Makes you feel loved?

by brave_little_toaster



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Angst, Boyfriends, Established Relationship, Gallavich, Ian comforts Mickey, Like non sexual sex? Does that make sense probs not, M/M, Mickey thinks about the past and some trauma, can't believe i wrote angst look at me go, co-dependancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-26 18:06:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10791909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brave_little_toaster/pseuds/brave_little_toaster
Summary: Mickey needs comfort but the only way he can accept affection is through Ian and sex. Ian attempts to help him and both understand sometimes they get like this: needy, scared, desperate to feel close and feeling limited through the ways they can try.





	Makes you feel loved?

Ian couldn't ignore his squirming boyfriend wiggling around the couch when they were supposed to be just laying together.

At first, Ian assumed Mickey was cold so he squeeze his limbs around him more which didn't stop his silent grumblings. Next, he tried pulling back to give him more room but Mickey glared at him till he wrapped his arms tightly around him again.

Running out of theories, he huffed 'keep still.' Mickey sighed but didn't say anything. Ian stroked his hair and guessed he had something he wanted to say but couldn't squeeze it out.

He whispered 'just ask me.' Mickey hesitated 'I just need...' Ian asked softly 'what do you need?' Mickey confessed 'fingers. Just... your fingers.' Ian nodded and understood. He fumbled with Mickey's zipper to pull his rough jeans down.

Sometimes Mickey got like this, desperate to feel Ian close to him but not necessarily in a sexual way. It was how his desire for affection manifested after a lifetime of abuse and lack of love.

Mickey took Ian's long fingers into his mouth, sucking and slopping a hefty amount of spit over them.

Ian wormed his way into Mickey and he finally started to relax. Ian commanded 'speak to me.' Mickey gulped 'sometimes... have to. You. Makes it better.' 

Ian wasn't exactly sure what his ramblings meant but he kept moving inside him to coax more out. 'Want you. In me. Feeling me.' Ian interrupted 'you like me playing with you?' Mickey answered with 'more.' 

Ian slipped in another digit and Mickey gripped his arms. 'It's fucking weird. Don't even need to cum. Just...' Ian finished 'makes you feel loved?' Mickey began to feel embarrassed and Ian felt his body close up on him.

Ian assured 'when you hold my hand. That's when I get it. Need it a lot. Wrapped around me, tight. Makes me safe. Calms me down. Don't feel sad anymore. Know that your there for me.' Mickey remained quiet as he had never known that.

Ian curled his fingers and Mickey's toes curled too. Ian murmured 'should I finish you off?' Mickey told him 'I got it.' Ian kept his leisurely pace and Mickey quietly pumped himself till he gasped and came.

Ian was about to removed himself but Mickey commanded 'no. Keep going.' Ian had purposefully avoided his prostate, understanding Mickey didn't fancy being a withering sweaty mess. It wasn't like that, right now. Ian said full of worry 'will start to hurt.'

He wasn't even stretching Mickey. Just digging deep and brushing his knuckles against his ass. Mickey pleaded ''s okay.'

Ian figured Mickey must be uncomfortable with the vulnerability so he didn't make him beg anymore. He just kept going, listening to his soft pants.

After a while Mickey started to wince and Ian apologised 'can't let myself hurt you. Have to pull out now.' He wished he could carry on as it was blatant how much Mickey craved it but there was no way he was putting him in pain.

He removed himself and Mickey let out a choked sob. Ian sounded extremely alarmed as Mickey never broke down in front of him 'Mick? What's wrong?' He didn't turn his body around which Mickey was grateful for because he didn't want Ian to see his tearstained face.

His voice cracked 'I feel empty.' Ian's heart broke because he wasn't just talking about inside him. He needed validation they were going to be okay. Ian hushed him and kissed his hair, holding him tight.

'I got you. Please, don't cry. You're safe. We're okay. Promise we can get through anything together. I love you so bad it hurts and it scares me, Mickey. You scare me because I care about you so much.' Mickey was full on whimpering as he never usually let Ian say so much about them.

Mickey let Ian hold him and he drifted off to a dreamless sleep. Ian watched the back of his head and kept replaying his ashamed snuffles. He tugged him tighter and mumbled 'I'll look after you forever. You're mine and I'm yours.'

**Author's Note:**

> I left the issue Mickey is struggling with unidentified because I wanted this to only demonstate Ian's POV and how he isn't quite sure how to help him. Also, lots of bad shit happened to him so it could be a manifestation of his life's harships. This was so unlike me to write, still, I hope you enjoyed :)


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